It’s Official…The Garden and I are NOT on Speaking Terms

I’ve always known I didn’t have a particilarly  Green Thumb. In fact I think mine may be more of  purplish-black. I’m horrible with plants, I forget to water them, I forget about them in extreme tempuratures, I overfeed the little suckers until their roots are bright blue. But since we moved into the townhome and we have a little garden that was bare, I decided that I would give the plant thing another shot.

So, for Mother’s Day, my own mother and I headed to Linders Garden Center. The place is GIMUNGUS! I got lost and seperated from my mother and cried, seriously I really did, well except for the crying part. But we were in flower heaven! You name it, they have it. They even have ones that you couldn’t name and ones you didn’t even know had names.  I’m in love with these, but they are a little pricey.  We were being cheap that day and didn’t get them.  Instead, i got some pink and orange daisies, some yellow snapdragons and pink and yellow Dahlias. Oh, yeah, I also decied to try some Dahlia summer bulbs.  We got them all home, safe and sound. I dug up the garden, topped it off with some top soil and got to planting.  They looked B-E-A-utiful. I made sure to water them carefuly and that they were getting enough sunlight. I even watched the weather to check on frost advisories (they did get covered one night with Sassy Pants’ flannel sheets).   They were thriving.

The garden now…well, it’s rebelling. Only one of the 3 bulbs came up, my snap dragons have become bushes instead of tall and majestic (I even staked them), the Dahlias don’t last more than a day because the rabbits keep eating them, WEEDS have taken over in full force, i just can’t keep up and someone is snipping off my Daisies and taking them home! So, right now, the garden and I are NOT on speaking terms.


Add a comment June 25, 2009

We Would Not, Could Not, in a house….

But a townhome will do just fine! It Official, we are moving out of our fully packed, cramped, way-too-small-for-a-family-with-2-boys apratment! YAY!!! We’re still renting, but it’s a townhome, with grass and room to stretch…annnnnd, we can FINALLY have a kitchen table to sit at and eat dinner, do crafts, and be a ‘normal’ family. we are sooo excited and sooooo stressed all at the same time.

The Townhome is cheaper, bigger and better. plus the lady we are going to rent from will let us paint and do what we want to it! (can u say practice for when we have our own place???).  Our boys will finally have seperate rooms…which means no more staggering bedtimes.

So for now, the move to Sioux City, IA is on hold until further notice.

Add a comment September 18, 2008

He Would not eat it Here or There, He Would Not Eat it Anywhere!

So lately the hubby and I have been dealing with an on-going, never ending battle of EPIC proportions! Landon REFUSES to eat dinner without playing around. When he is home with me on the weekends and even at daycare, he eats breakfast and lunch BEAUTIFULLY! But dinner is a constant battle. Allow me to paint a picture…


“I don’t like lasagna, I’ll just eat the bread.”

“Landon, you haven’t even tried it. You can’t eat just the bread.”

“YES, I can. Bread is good for you. I can eat it all if i Waaaant! I don’t like lasagna”

I told him he had to eat the lasagna and then i let it go. We decided that he would sit there until it was all gone or until bedtime, which ever came first.  We tried to ignore him, but he proceeded to play with his food…which resulted in lasagna on the carpet and the hubby and I yelling in tandum for him to turn around and eat.  this went on for 90 minutes almost. Needless to say, we were all exausted.

so we have decided to take a different approach, starting last night. If Landon doesn’t want to eat, fine. But he can’t have anything else to eat until he finishes his dinner. so if he wants a cookie or ice cream or a piece of candy, he has to sit down and finish his dinner first. Last night Landon decided to play, so he was excused from dinner and went to him room to play…i’m almost certain he went to bed hungry, but that was his choice. We as parents can’t win every battle, and we shouldn’t. Dinner was much less stress free last night.

And just in case you’re wondering about the lasagna night…he finished as the clock hit 8:00pm…bedtime. and his brother is the complete opposite…his meal is finished almost before we can put it in front of him!

Add a comment August 28, 2008

I would not, could not in a house…

Or rather, WE, Would not, could not in a house, at least not in MN. The hubby and I have decided that we can not afford to live in this state anymore. We are up to our Chiny, chin, chins in student loans, car loans, rent and the ever mounting medical/dental bills. And have decided that we will not be able to move into a house anytime soon, which our boys desperately need. sooo….

We have offically decided to move to Sioux City, IA. The cost of living is much cheaper and houses are most certainly a LOT cheaper than here in MN. We will be moving sometime in the next six months. I’m scared! I’m scared of having to start over. New job, new city, new friends, no family, no old friends…nothing familiar to me at all. Everything i have ever known is here, how can i leave?  Is it really the best option for my family?

I have been able to kind of answer these questions on my own. Our kids need a house to mess up and a yard to run in…my husband needs room to further his career with less competition…and i need to let go and find myself, all on my own, without my best friends and my mother by my side….but sometimes these questions sneak back up on me when i least expect it…oh well…

Time to let loose and fly!

Add a comment July 14, 2008

Books to Read…or at least find out what they are!!

A new “top 100” reading list has emerged….where they got it no one knows. I must say i haven’t even heard of a lot of these, and i’ve read a good portion of these. Am i out of the Loop?

The Big Read is an NEA program designed to encourage community reading initiatives. They’ve come up with this list of the top 100 books, using criteria they don’t explain, and they estimate that the average adult has only read 6 of these. So, we are encouraged to:


1) Look at the list and bold those we have read.

2) Italicize those we intend to read.

3) Underline the books we LOVE/Bold the ones we’ve read

4) Reprint this list in our own blogs



1 Pride and Prejudice – Jane Austen

2 The Lord of the Rings – JRR Tolkien

3 Jane Eyre – Charlotte Bronte

4 Harry Potter series – JK Rowling, most of it anyways

5 To Kill a Mockingbird – Harper Lee

6 The Bible

7 Wuthering Heights – Emily Bronte

8 Nineteen Eighty Four – George Orwell

9 His Dark Materials – Philip Pullman

10 Great Expectations – Charles Dickens

11 Little Women – Louisa M Alcott

12 Tess of the D’Urbervilles – Thomas Hardy

13 Catch 22 – Joseph Heller

14 Complete Works of Shakespeare-Most of them but not all…working on it!

15 Rebecca – Daphne Du Maurier

16 The Hobbit – JRR Tolkien

17 Birdsong – Sebastian Faulks

18 Catcher in the Rye – JD Salinger

19 The Time Traveler’s Wife – Audrey Niffenegger

20 Middlemarch – George Eliot

21 Gone With The Wind – Margaret Mitchell

22 The Great Gatsby – F Scott Fitzgerald

23 Bleak House – Charles Dickens

24 War and Peace – Leo Tolstoy, well parts of it…have u ever tried to read this…UGH!

25 The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy – Douglas Adams

26 Brideshead Revisited – Evelyn Waugh

27 Crime and Punishment – Fyodor Dostoyevsky

28 Grapes of Wrath – John Steinbeck

29 Alice in Wonderland – Lewis Carroll

30 The Wind in the Willows – Kenneth Grahame

31 Anna Karenina – Leo Tolstoy

32 David Copperfield – Charles Dickens

33 Chronicles of Narnia – CS Lewis

34 Emma – Jane Austen

35 Persuasion – Jane Austen

36 The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe – CS Lewis

37 The Kite Runner – Khaled Hosseini

38 Captain Corelli’s Mandolin – Louis De Bernieres

39 Memoirs of a Geisha – Arthur Golden

40 Winnie the Pooh – AA Milne

41 Animal Farm – George Orwell

42 The Da Vinci Code – Dan Brown

43 One Hundred Years of Solitude – Gabriel Garcia Marquez

44 A Prayer for Owen Meaney – John Irving

45 The Woman in White – Wilkie Collins

46 Anne of Green Gables – LM Montgomery

47 Far From The Madding Crowd – Thomas Hardy

48 The Handmaid’s Tale – Margaret Atwood

49 Lord of the Flies – William Golding

50 Atonement – Ian McEwan

51 Life of Pi – Yann Martel

52 Dune – Frank Herbert

53 Cold Comfort Farm – Stella Gibbons

54 Sense and Sensibility – Jane Austen

55 A Suitable Boy – Vikram Seth

56 The Shadow of the Wind – Carlos Ruiz Zafon

57 A Tale Of Two Cities – Charles Dickens

58 Brave New World – Aldous Huxley

59 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time – Mark Haddon

60 Love In The Time Of Cholera – Gabriel Garcia Marquez

61 Of Mice and Men – John Steinbeck

62 Lolita – Vladimir Nabokov

63 The Secret History – Donna Tartt

64 The Lovely Bones – Alice Sebold

65 Count of Monte Cristo – Alexandre Dumas

66 On The Road – Jack Kerouac

67 Jude the Obscure – Thomas Hardy

68 Bridget Jones’s Diary – Helen Fielding

69 Midnight’s Children – Salman Rushdie

70 Moby Dick – Herman Melville

71 Oliver Twist – Charles Dickens

72 Dracula – Bram Stoker

73 The Secret Garden – Frances Hodgson Burnett

74 Notes From A Small Island – Bill Bryson

75 Ulysses – James Joyce

76 The Bell Jar – Sylvia Plath

77 Swallows and Amazons – Arthur Ransome

78 Germinal – Emile Zola

79 Vanity Fair – William Makepeace Thackeray

80 Possession – AS Byatt

81 A Christmas Carol – Charles Dickens

82 Cloud Atlas – David Mitchell

83 The Color Purple – Alice Walker

84 The Remains of the Day – Kazuo Ishiguro

85 Madame Bovary – Gustave Flaubert

86 A Fine Balance – Rohinton Mistry

87 Charlotte‘s Web – EB White

88 The Five People You Meet In Heaven – Mitch Albom

89 Adventures of Sherlock Holmes – Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

90 The Faraway Tree Collection – Enid Blyton

91 Heart of Darkness – Joseph Conrad

92 The Little Prince – Antoine De Saint-Exupery – My goal is to read it in French

93 The Wasp Factory – Iain Banks

94 Watership Down – Richard Adams

95 A Confederacy of Dunces – John Kennedy Toole

96 A Town Like Alice – Nevil Shute

97 The Three Musketeers – Alexandre Dumas

98 Hamlet – William Shakespeare

99 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory – Roald Dahl

100 Les Miserables – Victor Hugo

Ummm…ok pretty sure that The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe is a part of Chronicles of Narnia, so that must free up at least one spot…

there are some books that are definately missing from this list…what are they? Anyone?


Add a comment July 14, 2008

Would you, Could you, in a House?

I woke up this morning with the sun shining on my face, birds sining, a fresh cool breeze blowing through my hair and a tiny little elbow jabbing me in the back…. “good morning mom! Do i Have to go to daycare today?”….”yes Landon, you do have to go to daycare today.”… a small frown crossed my 4 year olds face and then it was back to wiggling to snuggle under the covers with me until he would be forced out of my warm cozy bed to get dressed.

I listened to him whine while daddy took his hand and led him into his bedroom to get dressed for the day…”i don’t want to get dressed, you do it for me.”  I snuggled deeper into the cool, crisp sheets, squeezed my eyes shut and thought to myself…”i hear you Landon, mommy wishes someone would it for me too.”

Some days I wish someone would do it for me. Pay my bills, clean my house, do the laundry, cook meals, bathe the kids….but then again those are the things that i really do love doing (sounds crazy, i know!). But some days, by the time i get home from work, i’m mentally and physically exhausted and all i want to do is veg for a while in front of the tv.

lately i have found myself doing that a lot. I don’t even really like half the shows I find myself watching. I think part of it has to do with the fact that i can’t just take my kids out the back door into a yard…our “patio” door leads out to a balcolny that is definately not up to code and a samll child could easily fall through the giant gaps(not letting my children play out there!) I feel like a prisoner in out small apartment.  i want to be able to watch my kids play in the grass and have a slide and swings. We need a house…

Who knew that being a mother and working full time, while trying to stay sane, be a good and loving wife and still trying to be there for my friends, could be so draining. i’m tired.

Add a comment May 15, 2008

Lost and Seeking…

***Warning…this is a slight pity party. But hey it’s my blog, so i’ll write whatever i want to!***

4 years ago i gave birth to a beautiful miracle at the ripe ol’ age of, yep, you guessed it, 18. A senior in high school i found myself in a situation that i never imagined. I finished high school in the top of my class, walking away, proud to say that i had done it, Cum Laude style! I swore to myself and my baby that i would make the most of myself and that i would never give up on my dreams, no matter what stood in my way, and that happened to be a lot…

I enrolled in college, as a distinguished student, and flourished. I love learning , no matter how hard the subject. I finished my first year, all while raising a baby, moving out of my mothers house, welcoming back my soon to be husband from Iraq and holding down a job.

The summer after my first year in college, we got married and he got deployed again…no problem right? i did it once, i can do it again. oh how so very wrong i was. I started and ended my 2nd year in college in less than a month. I was overwhelmed. Being a full time mother, student and employee (all while worrying every night if your husband will come home) is hard work and something had to give. Now since i couldn’t stop being a mommy and the bills had to be payed somehow….school was on the chopping block. I promised myself it was just for a year….

3 years later here i sit…wondering where my dreams went. i gave up, simply put. i gave up trying and caring i guess…but wait i do still care!! i still do have dreams, dreams that i love and am so passionate about! what happened?

i got stuck. that’s what happened. I got stuck in the work rut and in the mind set that “i can’t afford not work and i can’t give up my time with my family to go back to school.”

i found myself in a tough spot that past 2 weeks. All of my friends and their friends and what feels like everyone, are graduating from college. I feel like a slight failure. i can’t help but think, that should be me too!

I lost control of my life. I mean really…i’m stuck in a dead end job that i dislike with a passion. I found out that without a degree it’s pretty much impossible to go anywhere within the company, unless you know someone at the top of the food chain who is willing to take a risk on you. I feel like i have pushed so many people out of my life because i am so unhappy with myself that i can’t stand to see them happy. Yeah, sure i have friends…but they are all the friends that are graduating and they are doing what they love and what they are passionate about….even my husband finished culinary school while dealing with 2 deployments in Iraq and while still finding time while he was going to school 30 hours a week to fit in 35 hours at work to help support us.

Please don’t get me wrong, i am so proud of my friends for all that they have accomplished,but being human, it’s hard not to feel that tug of jealousy everytime they talk about college. And i would hate for you to think that i am not proud of my husband. He has sacrificed a lot for our family and i couldn’t be prouder. And i love being a mother. there is no better feeling in the world then hearing i love you whispered to you from the back seat, or seeing that chubby, tiny hand hand trying so hard to wave bye-bye.

i just wish i knew what happened to ME. Where did I go? the girl who once had it all figured out, the girl that promised her newborn baby that she would never give up…never! I’m lost and seeking for ME again.

1 comment May 15, 2008






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